I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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