yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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