now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I understand Curling. That high.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
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