My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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