I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Do vagina's smell?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
