can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
And then he peed in my hair
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