How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Panties = found
Randomize
