You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I can text with my tongue
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Operation Purity has been aborted
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
