Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
