She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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