ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
