You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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