you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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