so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
