I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
