How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
