Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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