what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
