just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
