I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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