ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
