i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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