The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Ketchup is God's man juice
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
You ruined the universe
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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