Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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