I heard we made out
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
