He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
