I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Randomize
