i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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