trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
