i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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