ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
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