Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't turn off my feet"
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
He shit in the fireplace
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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