I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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