The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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