plz talk dirty to me
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
