we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
