I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize