my vag is so smooth its legendary
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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