Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Randomize