I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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