did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
