If i come over, it means nothing
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
