i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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