Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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