i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize