What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
don't judge my taste in strippers
When are your genitals available?
Randomize