My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
