do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize
