it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
So squirting runs in the family.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize