I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
