There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize