At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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